As I was making my lists and checking them twice (or 3 or 4 times!) this morning, I was marveling over the year that I have had!
Surviving last winter seems like a feat in itself! I don't ever remember having to clear our roof in the 25 years I have lived here! I am so Thankful to my boys, including my son in law, and also to my nephews and Larry for the help clearing the deck and the roof! You were all amazing and a Blessing!
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| The snow in the front yard was higher than the front porch! |
By April, we found ourselves really gearing up for Briana and Matt's wedding! Wedding invitation assembly line, showers starting, another visit to Blue Dress Barn, and more! Such an amazing, wonderful, special time! I am so Thankful to everyone who was a part of this day, you were truly Blessings to myself and our family! And, I am so very Thankful to have gained a wonderful young man for a son in law!
I am always very Thankful for my kids! You make me smile and laugh, you make me proud, you are helpful. You are each a Blessing; Chase, Drew, Briana and Matt...I love you all!
I am Thankful for my friends and family! Someone is always up for an outing, a road trip, a hike or an adventure! For this I am Thankful! Truthfully, I can and, sometimes do, these things on my own and even enjoy the quiet, peaceful solitude but, I have also come to realize that doing things with someone else often shows me much more than I would see on my own! They see, notice or appreciate something I did not and, in turn I may see something they did not. It is double the fun! So thankful for these wonderful people I've been Blessed to have in my life!
I am Thankful for my Book Club Bibliophile Besties! Our book club rocks! I have been pushed to read books I would not have otherwise read and am more enriched because of it. Book Club is often like group therapy for most of us at one time or another :) Books, food, and great friends; who could ask for more?!
I am Thankful for my jobs! I know I have said it before but, I really do love what I do! Both of my jobs, the people I work with and the people I have met as a result of these jobs are things I am very Thankful for! They have been a Blessing to me during times when focusing on something outside of my personal struggles with loss and grief was truly a sanity saver!
I am Thankful for new beginnings and new lives, babies! Two weddings this year, friends who, as it turns out, met online and , Briana and Matt's. And, we have been Blessed by 2 new additions this year; Baby Jackson in February for whom I am Blessed to be a (honorary) Nonnie and Delilah in May, my adorable great niece. I love the baby snuggles and spoiling them a tiny bit!
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| Jackson and I reading together |
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| Delilah as a delightful baby bee and myself at Paint A Pot |
As the Holidays approach, I am Thankful for so much! My home, heat, food, and creature comforts that we can so easily take for granted like a dishwasher, washer and dryer and more! With only days to go before Thanksgiving, I am contemplating that reality of not having Briana and Matt with us in person to celebrate! In all honesty, it is making me a bit sad. As a family, I think we are still getting used to the idea of the "empty chair" that was Jeff's. Now, this year we will be facing more empty space around the table and around the tree. I am so very Thankful for our phones and Skype so that we may all be able to talk and visit despite the many miles that separate us! I am also Thankful for the ability to text and see the kids on Facebook, it feels like they are closer with these things available to us!
This year really has been one of change, enlightenment and growth. We have added to our family with Briana and Matt's wedding and then Briana and Matt moved to Colorado immediately after their wedding. Briana started Grad school and Matt started a new job. Chase and Drew are doing well in their jobs and I have taken on more tasks at the winery. That is a lot of changes!
The wedding also got me to thinking about a lot of things. A lot of memories for me of course but, it also prompted me to think about where I am and where I am going. It made me realize that, for almost 33 years, the "me" I knew and was, was part of a "we." In the last 2 1/2 years, I have been discovering who the "me" I am now is without being part of a "we." I never thought about this until recently. I'm in a good place in my life and I realized that I was thinking about the possibility of sharing that place with someone else at some time. That was a shocker to me! I had been asked out a couple of times but was not to a point where I was ready to consider that. With wedding planning in full swing at this time, I put all these thoughts on hold. Once we were through the wedding and my mind was free to contemplate thoughts outside of work and wedding, I decided to explore some options. On the advice of more than a few friends, some of whom have experienced great success in this venue, I signed up with an online dating site. (GULP!) Let's face it, I work a lot and do not meet available men at my jobs. Where else to meet someone??? I'm almost 4 months into this and have "gone out" a few times. (remember, my last "first date" was in 1979!!! Boy have things changed. And, so have I!) I have "talked" to many, have blocked a few, and rolled my eyes and sighed at more than I can count! (Sorry, I don't mean to sound harsh or rude but seriously, you would be amazed at some of the things people say and do. The pics they post and so much more!!!) Right now, I have to admit that this method of meeting others still feels "unnatural." It also takes a lot of time! Heading into a very busy season for me, I am finding that it is too time consuming. The latest guy I have been chatting with seems frustrated when I am not "online" if I am home, if I am delayed in responding to a message, and when I wasn't available to go to a game the next night. ( I had already told him I would be working.). I don't have the time, energy, or patience to soothe egos, and I don't want to be "unfair" to anyone when I know now that the next 5 weeks will be very busy! I would still like to meet someone if that it what is meant to be ( if it is meant to be, it will be and if not I'm good :) ) but, for now, I have suspended my online dating profile. I may go back after the holidays, may try another site or who knows; may meet someone in the grocery store (an inside joke!)!
"Life is a Journey" that I am enjoying to the fullest and trying to "Make every moment count!"
I am Thankful for each of you and wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas!!!
(((Hugs)))
Brenda
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